Joseph prays for wisdom: A fable

The subject of this week's reading was the First Vision. My reflection this week is a sort of fable.

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Some time in the second year after Joseph Smith's family moved to Manchester, there was in the place where he lived an unusual excitement on the subject of gay marriage. The New York Court of Appeals had recently ruled in favor of allowing gays to be married by the state, and many of the sects in that region of the country immediately raised a cry and tumult, calling for the state constitution to be revised so as to restrict marriage to the union of a man and a woman. This created no small stir and division among the people, some contending in favor of gay marriage and some against. A great strife of words and contest about opinions ensued, with one side accusing the other of being motivated by prejudice and hate, while that side insisted that gay marriage would destroy the very fabric of society.

Joseph was at this time in his fifteenth year. His father's family had been proselyted by Latter-day Saint missionaries, and four of them had joined that church, namely, his mother, Lucy; his brothers Hyrum and Samuel Harrison; and his sister Sophronia. Joseph had been attending meetings of the Methodists as often as occasion would permit; but he too decided to be baptized into the LDS Church, partly for love of his mother and also because the teaching and the community among LDS members gave him a warm feeling.

During this time of great excitement over gay marriage, Joseph's mind was called up to serious reflection and great uneasiness. The Methodists had been divided over issues related to homosexuality, but the leaders of the LDS Church were unanimously and forcefully opposed to gay marriage. There was much preaching on that subject in ward meetings, with members being exhorted to dedicate their time and means to campaign for the proposition that would revise the constitution to ban gay marriage. Outside the church, however, other parties were equally zealous in endeavoring to persuade the public to vote against the proposition. The feelings that each party's arguments evoked in Joseph were deep and poignant. He felt he ought to take direction from the leaders of the church to which he had committed himself; yet it also seemed to him that the campaign against gay marriage had led to the expression of much bad feeling against gay people on the part of church members. But so great were the confusion and strife on this issue that it was impossible for Joseph to come to any certain conclusion who was right and who was wrong, or what he ought to do.

One day, while he was laboring under the difficulties caused by the contests of these parties, Joseph read James 1:5. The passage spoke to his heart with great power. He reflected on it again and again, knowing that if any person needed wisdom from God, he did; for how to act, he did not know, and unless he could get more wisdom than he had, he would never know. At length he came to the conclusion that he must either remain in confusion, or else he must do as James directed. He determined to "ask of God," concluding that if God gave wisdom to those who lacked wisdom, and would give liberally, and not upbraid, then he might venture.

In accordance with this determination, he retired to the woods to make the attempt. Having looked around, and finding himself alone, Joseph knelt down and began to offer up the desires of his heart to God.

The first intimation of the spirit of revelation came to him as a sudden stroke of an idea, a feeling of pure intelligence flowing into him. It seemed to enter with great force into every feeling of his heart. He knew as surely as he knew that he lived that the campaign to ban gay marriage was inhumane and unchristian, a work of fear and false traditions. He felt a powerful impression that God was doing away with former things and bringing to pass a new thing, shedding abroad new light and new understanding. That idea seemed delicious to him; it made him feel that his mind was being opened, his views expanded, and his soul enlightened. As the experience came to an end, these feelings faded, but Joseph was no longer in doubt about what he needed to do.

A few days after this experience, Joseph was in the company of the local LDS bishop, who wanted Joseph to join other ward members in going door-to-door urging people to vote for the proposition to ban gay marriage. Joseph told the bishop he could not do that in good conscience, and he gave the bishop an account of the experience he had when he prayed. The bishop treated his experience not only lightly but with contempt, saying that Joseph had plainly received his revelation from the wrong source; that personal revelation must always be measured against the teachings of church leaders; that the duty of members was to prepare themselves so that when the leaders speak, the Holy Ghost can confirm to them that what the leaders are saying is true; that the Lord would never allow church leaders to lead the church astray. The thought came to Joseph that if all this were true, then the apostle James ought to have advised those who seek wisdom, not to ask of God, but to search the teachings of church leaders, since that is where people would have to go in the end anyway to determine if the wisdom they thought they had received from God were truly of God. But Joseph did not want to contend with the bishop, so he said nothing.

Joseph soon found, however, that his telling the story had excited a great deal of prejudice against him in the ward. Other members became distant toward him. Remarks were made from the pulpit regarding the duty to follow church leaders and the arrogance of presuming to know better than those whom God had appointed to receive revelation. Joseph was even called in by the stake president, who warned him that if he spoke out publicly against the campaign to ban same-sex marriage, he could be subjected to discipline, perhaps leading to his being cast out from among the Saints.

This was a cause of great sorrow to Joseph. It caused him serious reflection how strange it was that with so many church members united in support of the campaign, his one voice of dissent should be thought of sufficient importance to attract attention, and in such a manner as to create a spirit of bitterness toward him. But all this did not destroy the reality of Joseph's experience. He knew what the Spirit had communicated to him. He knew it was true, and he knew that God knew it, and he could not deny it, nor could all the world make him think or believe otherwise.

He had now got his mind satisfied as far as this issue was concerned. He did not know how, exactly, the reality of his personal revelation was to be reconciled with the Church's teachings about following the leaders as living prophets. But he knew it was not his duty to join with other church members in support of the proposition to ban gay marriage, but to continue as he was in the confidence that someday there would be greater understanding. He had found the testimony of James to be true—that a person who lacked wisdom might ask of God, and obtain, and not be upbraided. Not upbraided by God, anyway.